So I have to admit that I haven’t be on a bike since I was probably 12 years old, but when we inherited slightly used hand-me-downs from Shawn’s parents I was pretty stoked. I was finally going to be one of those wicked cool people that ride around town all Lance Armstrong like with their tight clothes and aerodynamicness. I’m such a wannabe. Too bad I have no idea what I’m doing.
I took one look at my new bike; a green Trek Bontrager decked out with all the bells and whistles. I recognized the seat, handlebars, tires, and pedals. I had no idea what the word up was on all the dohickies attached. I cautiously positioned myself on the bike, which had to be immediately adjusted due to the fact I’m vertically challenged. You know, the PC was of saying I should probably sit on top of a large phone book when at the wheel of a car (I have every intention of being a driving danger to society when I’m 80). Even still I struggled a little with getting on the seat. Awesome. I love obstacles and challenges (no I don’t). After getting over my 9th grade self esteem issues I pedaled down the driveway of Live Action Headquarters and into the cul de sac. Shakey. Pathetic. Fearful when I turned. Wondered what the crap those things were on the pedals that trap your foot (holy death trap – those will be my demise). Wondered who the rip coined the phrase ‘as easy as riding a bike’. Wondered what that thing displaying 3 different numbers was for. I listened to Shawn shout out what I’m supposed to be doing with the gear shifters and wondered why the flip there were TWO of them. Shawn listened to me complain that the pedals don’t double as brakes like they did on my childhood bike. He couldn’t even formulate a response because apparently that question is THAT ridiculous (seriously, spinning your feet backwards, what’s the point of that?). Whatever, dude, I’ll figure it out myself. Where’s that 2 billion page manual?
I rode in circles at the end of the cul de sac, as the only 2 streets I had to choose from both had heinous hills I was soooo not going to tackle. I caught on. I gained a bit of confidence. I started enjoying it. I still didn’t know what the dohickies were for but I was ready to go buy my tight pants with the padded butt.
Fast forward a few days and Shawn has bought a Burley to tote the kids around behind the bike. Eons ago his mode of transport on the Coe College campus was his bike. As it was for the countless skydiving boogies he attended for over ten years to tool around all the tent cities and airport grounds. He spent a lot of time on mountain bike trails with his buddies and had loved his bike. Which still hangs in the garage. Needless to say he was happy to have a new kickin bike and get back out to do some recreational riding and to include his 2 kids. To top it off, teaching his wannabe wife how to ride would be the icing on the cake for him as Shawn luuuuuuvvvveeesss instructing me on anything.
We packed up and headed to the Cedar Valley Nature Trail but on the way there we had to stop and buy me a helmet. With those insane foot death traps I was probably going to need it. The plan was to breeze in and out of the shop, but trying on helmets ended up being a huge pain in the padded pants. It wasn’t until it occurred to me that since I wear a child size sunglasses and had so many problems with my size small skydive helmet I had to sell it, that quite possibly I’d have the same issues with a bike helmet. I broke down and bought the most comfortable fitting helmet ever, a child’s helmet. Yes, my name is Janet White and I have the head size of an 8 year old. I make up for it by having the brain of an 80 year old. No wait that didn’t come out right…
Once on the trail we hit our stride with Shawn staying in front of me because I was sooo over being told my feet weren’t going fast/slow enough. We rode and rode and the more we rode the more nervous I got that I was going to punk out and he’d have to find a way to ride both of our bikes back at the same time and carry me over his shoulder. I had no idea what my stamina would be. I didn’t work up to this point riding around the neighborhood, I jumped right into a trail ride. I had no idea if my legs would turn to rubber and wouldn’t be able to walk for the next two days. I panicked and said I wanted to turn around. Annoyed, Shawn led the pack back to the truck and informed me I barely rode 3 miles round trip. I’ve never done anything for 3 miles. I was sorta proud of myself and called the trip a success. Things I learned: I have a tiny head. I am married to a freakishly tall giant and I am freakishly NOT tall. Long legs ride faster than short legs. I will be in the best shape of my life if we continue to ride together and I continue to think I have to keep up. There is a ton to learn about how to ride a bike properly.
oh the thought of pedaling backwards to stop makes my brain hurt!